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<Crion> Movie night at The Wherehouse! Unless Stewart wants to host at his place?
<trenchfoot> Do we know what happens to movies in the Hedge? This might not be the one to try it out with.
<VoxPVoxD> He'd be happy to, if Melanie wanted to make the trip. She hasn't ever been to Stewart's apartment, to his knowledge. But the Wherehouse is fine too.
<Crion> Judging by previous exposure, it doesn't do anything immediately. You have to leave them in the Hedge awhile, and even then, it took a year or so for Jameson's Seinfeld collection to get truly strange.
<VoxPVoxD> Jimothy...
<Crion> Really the biggest issue is whether or not you want to expose Steve to Evangelion, though he might just, not be around.
<Crion> Who can tell with that guy.
<VoxPVoxD> Steve's seen weirder stuff.
<VoxPVoxD> ...right? Stewart knows Evangelion has a reputation but how weird can it get?
<trenchfoot> I mean, they drew so many cartoons that it looks like it's moving!
<banana> Melanie hasn't been to anyone's home since she came back to Baltimore. She's barely been to a few public buildings and the university. It's not that she doesn't want to, she's just afraid and feels like she'd be intruding and doesn't know how to act and you know, the usual.
<Crion> Lauren's response to that sentiment would be "yeah...probably," but with slight hesitation.
<VoxPVoxD> Wherever they are, Stewart says: "This movie's going to be in Japanese with subtitles - words on the screen - so if you've got reading glasses or something you're going to want them."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "It's neat that they finally found a way to put the words people were saying on the screen at the same time, instead of weird interstitials."
<Crion> Lauren would probably prefer the Wherehouse proper, both because it's safer and she spends a lot of time cooped up in the apartment anyway right now.
<VoxPVoxD> Yeah, let's do the Wherehouse.
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart wants to have people over at some point though... maybe for Christmas, or a housewarming type thing if Lauren moves in fully. oh god
<Crion> She'll make some snacks as everyone settles in and make sure the fridge is stocked. This was her idea, after all.
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart squints at the file name. "Evangelion-" he pronounces the g in Evangelion like the g in 'gif' "-one point eleven you are parentheses not alone."
<Crion> The Hedge sees what you did there.
<banana> Melanie's excited. "I'm excited. I've only seen American films before, and there's-" gesturing at The World "so much stuff out there. It's just too much to learn about all at once, what with all the local things.. and faerie realms.."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Tell me about it."
<banana> She's made a little perch with a platform thing off to the side of the sofas and a couple of pot plants. It's vaguely comfortable, like being in a forest or something.
<VoxPVoxD> A couple of- oh plants in pots.
<Crion> They could be potted pot plants.
<trenchfoot> It's... it's potted plants. In America.
<banana> Melanie: "How was world history teaching back then? We had like.. I don't remember much, but world wars - we won - and Britain colonising America. That was basically it."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Mostly they didn't talk about it to me. Had to go digging myself."
<banana> Melanie: "Lauren, is there anything we should know first? Like about Japanese society."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "I don't think that's how you spell works."
<Crion> Lauren: "Hmmm. I don't think so...? We'll find out."
<Crion> "Oh. Japanese society is really obsessed with high school."
<Crion> "Which is why high schoolers are protagonists in a lot of its mass media."
<banana> Melanie: "That's all pretty ruined."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart winces.
<banana> o_o
<trenchfoot> "He... came to this weird town where everything is bloody and destroyed because a pretty lady gave him a picture?"
<banana> "Seems like it was a bad idea."
<trenchfoot> "Is that one of those nuclear weapons I read about?"
<Crion> Apropos of nothing: "Oh this movie is incredibly horny, by the way."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "Wow that is overt atomic bomb imagery."
<Crion> Lauren: "Yep."
<banana> Melanie: "I'm amazed the girl actually showed up."
<banana> "Gills??"
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Okay, they should have seen that one coming. If you say 'it's over' it never actually is."
<Crion> "Misato is like...24? In this movie? So basically ancient. Unspeakably old."
<VoxPVoxD> "I like her car."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "That's the wrong side of the car, isn't it?"
<VoxPVoxD> "Outside the US most cars are like that."
<trenchfoot> "I don't like that guy."
<banana> Melanie: "I like the doomsaying calm guy."
<banana> "Wait, is that the guy you don't like?"
<Crion> Lauren: "Good instincts and bad instincts, respectively."
<VoxPVoxD> "God's in his Heaven and all's right with the world."
<trenchfoot> Nels nods, but she's still focused on the subtitles.
<banana> "They're both Ikari. Must be the dad."
<Crion> Lauren: "It's a quote from...Yeats?"
<Crion> "Some poet."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart, who knows virtually nothing of poetry, nods.
<Crion> Lauren: "This is so much more expensively animated than the TV show, it's unreal."
<banana> "Amazing imagery. Largely incomprehensible."
<VoxPVoxD> "I assume this was made after the TV show got really big and popular?"
<trenchfoot> Nels: "It's really - um, 'pretty' isn't quite right..."
<Crion> Lauren: "Yeah, like...twenty years later? Once he was hugely successful and could demand a massive budget."
<banana> "Ahahaha!"
<banana> "God I wish I could do that. Just fall out of sigh ton a glowing elevator when I'm done."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Some reunion."
<VoxPVoxD> "He doesn't care about his son at all."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "He does, as a tool."
<Crion> Lauren: "Which is honestly kind of worse."
<banana> Melanie: "Unfortunately that's the most normal thing going on here."
<trenchfoot> "...angels, cross-shaped explosions..."
<VoxPVoxD> "So wait he walks in the door and he has to go right back out to fight some kind of laser cancer monster?"
<trenchfoot> "And his dad is like 'yeah, that's the only reason I contacted you in the first place.'"
<Crion> Lauren: "Yep."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "The spare???"
<VoxPVoxD> "The spare."
<banana> "Haha.. ha."
<banana> "At least she knows what's going on, maybe."
<VoxPVoxD> "She does not... look... fit for duty."
<trenchfoot> "I don't think arms should bend like that."
<Crion> Lauren: "Fucking Gendo."
<trenchfoot> That is a lot of blood.
<banana> "Psychological contamination."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Um."
<trenchfoot> "That isn't real, is it?"
<Crion> Lauren: "There's a lot of uh, literalization of emotional and mental trauma in this particular anime."
<trenchfoot> "You don't drown people to make them control, tanks or whatever the real equivalent?"
<Crion> Lauren: "You do not."
<VoxPVoxD> "No, when you get submerged in a liquid you can breathe you feel like you're drowning for a lot longer than a couple seconds."
<banana> Melanie's focused on all the mechanical movements and human-body references. It's absurd but dramatic.
<banana> "This wouldn't work as a film without the family bit, it's like Godzilla-but-fast."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Family is maybe generous. What a shithead father."
<Crion> Lauren: "Funny you say that. The guy who did these interrupted doing them to make a Godzilla movie. Was really good, too."
<VoxPVoxD> "A lot of families are like this."
<VoxPVoxD> "Not with the robots, but the other thing."
<banana> "While he's figuring out how to walk would be a great time to use its laser explosion."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "I know."
<VoxPVoxD> "What the fuck!"
<banana> "Oh but I see sheer brutality takes precedence."
<trenchfoot> "Um."
<VoxPVoxD> "Was he even trained to use that thing??"
<banana> "He just heard of it for the first time fifteen minutes ago!"
<Crion> Lauren: "He was not! It's unclear what Gendo expected to happen here. At least, it is right now."
<trenchfoot> "Why does - um. Ritsuko? Why does she care more than his actual father."
<trenchfoot> "Wait, no, Misato."
<Crion> "I think you're talking about Misato, but honestly, they both do."
<banana> "Who cares right now, wow"
<trenchfoot> "Ritsuko is the blonde one. I'm going to get that wrong again."
<banana> "Look at this thing, it's fighting on its own! A 'synthetic human'!"
<VoxPVoxD> No wedding ring.
<Crion> Lauren snort-laughs.
<trenchfoot> Still a lot of cross imagery.
<Crion> Stewart's pretty sure she's thinking the same thing, independently.
<VoxPVoxD> Good.
<trenchfoot> "Okay, what the fuck."
<VoxPVoxD> "So my understanding is that in the genre of stuff this is built on, these psychic tumor demons are typically robots instead."
<VoxPVoxD> "Nice, dry robots."
<banana> Melanie: "Now the walking out of the explosion is on the other foot."
<VoxPVoxD> Clones??
<trenchfoot> The previous "what the fuck" still stands.
<VoxPVoxD> "'Seele' is German for 'soul'."
<Crion> Lauren: "Anno -- guy who gave himself a breakdown making the original show -- has said the Catholicism and Christian mystery stuff in here isn't used because of a coherent allegory about religion, but rather because over in Japan, that stuff kind of evokes a vast, alien sort of violence. The Japanese experience of Christianity is uh. Different than America's."
<Crion> "Well."
<Crion> "I guess not really."
<Crion> "You just have to go back farther."
<banana> "Meaningless, incredibly violent imagery. It's not that different."
<banana> "Oh- is it the obelisks talking?"
<Crion> "They're Mysterious World Leaders. Illuminati types."
<banana> "I thought Gendo was saying everything because the voices are similar.."
<VoxPVoxD> "They're like Skype calls with the camera off."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Wait, is the Illuminati real?"
<VoxPVoxD> "Nnnnnnnnnnnyes."
<banana> Melanie: "Yes, but they're vampires."
<trenchfoot> Nels stands up to go get another drink without a word.
<banana> "Shinji is very upset."
<VoxPVoxD> "So the two organizations are 'brain' and 'soul'."
<Crion> Lauren: "Normal."
<VoxPVoxD> This is gonna be brutal if Misato's the only one with any energy.
<Crion> Lauren: "God I envy her metabolism."
<VoxPVoxD> Hopefully they add more lively characters...
<trenchfoot> Nels sits back down. "So it sounded like, despite making a journey to a dangerous place to meet his dad, he's going to be living with a relative stranger instead. Did I mishear?"
<Crion> Lauren: "You did not."
<banana> "Eh."
<banana> "Oh!"
<banana> "The city they destroyed was fake?"
<Crion> "You maybe missed his dad and him having a staredown and him refusing to get on the elevator with him."
<banana> "Gendo thinks he failed to pilot the robot."
<trenchfoot> "Honestly that's fair. Also what happened to Tokyos 1 and 2."
<Crion> To Melanie: "It's...realish. Basically the stuff on the surface gets evacuated/rebuilt all the time. I love all the macroconstruction stuff in this series."
<VoxPVoxD> "It's all so empty..."
<VoxPVoxD> "Misato rules."
<banana> "It's amazing, but sits really weirdly with all this.. normal life stuff. The whole film is huge technology things with tiny little human spaces in corners of them."
<Crion> "Like I said..."
<Crion> "What a metabolism."
<banana> "Shinji's thinking something similar."
<VoxPVoxD> "She even uses Linux."
<trenchfoot> "That beer is extremely conveniently located."
<Crion> "Hello to Misato's Steve."
<banana> IT'S A HOBGOBLIN
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart cackles.
<trenchfoot> Nels snorts after the beer gets pulled away.
<banana> Melanie: "Yesss."
<VoxPVoxD> "I wonder if there's any other boys his age left in the whole world."
<Crion> Lauren: "Man I forgot about the tape player. Those were contemporary when the show came out!"
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Are they not anymore?"
<banana> "'Oh, that's why.'"
<trenchfoot> That was a hell of a cut.
<trenchfoot> "What a dick!"
<VoxPVoxD> "Oh, so there are other boys, but they're shitheads."
<banana> "Maybe he's an angel."
<Crion> Lauren: "Yeah, it's realistic like that."
<trenchfoot> "Pretty cool that he saved the world and one person told him he did a good job, and one other person punched him in the face for it."
<Crion> Lauren: "Well that's nightmarish. Forgot about that."
<VoxPVoxD> "Ender's Game shit."
<banana> "That's a really disturbing chant."
<trenchfoot> Nels makes a mental note to read Ender's Game later.
<VoxPVoxD> No!!
<trenchfoot> What? You're the one who brought it up.
<VoxPVoxD> "I don't think humans and hedgehogs are actually similar in that way."
<banana> "Okay so like."
<Crion> Lauren: "I mean, grading on a curve, it's still a pretty deep metaphor for a military officer."
<trenchfoot> "I mean, sort of? But that's a weird metaphor to use."
<banana> "Why are they making either of them go to school? Is this meant to be helpful psychologically?"
<Crion> Lauren: "Like I said...they love high school over there. It's a genre trope."
<VoxPVoxD> "I like how there's just... no blue water anywhere."
<trenchfoot> "Is that like. The sea?"
<trenchfoot> "And it's just red now."
<Crion> Luaren: "Yeah. It's a real good and affecting garbling of turning the Nile to blood."
<banana> "I loved high school." Sort of. "But it's time-consuming, and so is fighting huge monsters in an upside-down city."
<trenchfoot> Absently: "Never went."
<VoxPVoxD> "Oh that's what the Emerald Weapon attack in Final Fantasy 7 was referencing."
<Crion> Lauren, to Stewart: "So that's weird, right? Using adjacent urinals?"
<VoxPVoxD> "Yes."
<Crion> "Isn't not doing that like...a guy code thing?"
<trenchfoot> "That kid is going to die."
<VoxPVoxD> "It's very weird."
<banana> "Okay, that's different."
<trenchfoot> "What the fuck."
<banana> "This feels almost routine now, so I bet it goes poorly."
<VoxPVoxD> "Fuckin car-sized shell casings."
<trenchfoot> "Update: it went poorly."
<Crion> "Skyscraper-sized rifle."
<VoxPVoxD> "Did that say umbilical?"
<banana> "That's two for two seize-up-in-trauma. What did they expect."
<Crion> "It did say that."
<VoxPVoxD> "Oh jeez and with the fluid... it's like a birth thing. Metaphorically that robot is his mom."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "That's weird. This is weird."
<trenchfoot> Why is that idiot teen's first thought about his camera.
<VoxPVoxD> Those are expensive!
<trenchfoot> So's his life.
<trenchfoot> Speaking of lives. "That's... one way of reacting here..."
<VoxPVoxD> "Fuckin... same."
<banana> "I think she realises there's literally no good way to react here."
<banana> Melanie: "Jesus."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "I don't think he's around, what with." She waves vaguely.
<VoxPVoxD> "Look sometimes you just gotta... become homeless out of alienation and spite."
<Crion> Lauren: "This show is kind of a pointed critique of all the giant robot shows in Japanese animation history, where 15 year olds pilot giant robots and win the day like superheroes."
<trenchfoot> He's*
<banana> "Yeah I was going to ask questions like.. why did they make it."
<trenchfoot> "Why does anyone make anything?"
<trenchfoot> "That's, um. Worrying. Also."
<banana> "'But if you do leave, the city will be destroyed'."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart makes a face. "It is so not his decision."
<Crion> Lauren: "Misato is...in a tough spot. But she doesn't exactly cover herself in glory."
<trenchfoot> "It really isn't. Like, pick for yourself, but also if you choose to walk away - oh wow that is a late title card - everybody dies."
<Crion> Lauren: "...Boys."
<banana> "I think he actually felt empowered by that."
<Crion> Lauren: "No one seems to like this guy."
<banana> "Gendo is so calm."
<trenchfoot> "It's probably bad that its first reaction is to try and kill Gendo."
<trenchfoot> "Well no, it's good, but."
<VoxPVoxD> "I've had days like that."
<trenchfoot> The spicy robot...
<Crion> Lauren: "I think Misato meant the part where Gendo showed emotion, Ritsuko."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Do you think he's ever spoken to his son like that." The answer is no, but it it's phrased like a question.
<Crion> "Mmmmm."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "That's gross."
<banana> "One word of praise isn't in the script."
<trenchfoot> "I liked the thing she did with her eyes earlier. Um. Sort of - blank, tired."
<trenchfoot> "The animators did it obviously but you know what I mean."
<banana> Eyes...
<trenchfoot> Nels: "He has a thing about thresholds."
<VoxPVoxD> "About boundaries."
<VoxPVoxD> "He's permanently anxious."
<Crion> Lauren: "Hooo."
<trenchfoot> "Oh! Oh, I saw a thing about this!" She pulls out her phone to double check, missing the entire scene. "'Big mood'?"
<VoxPVoxD> "Oh come on."
<banana> "If you rely on a pair of siblings to save the world it's important to treat them like- oh come on."
<Crion> Lauren: "Warned you about the horniness."
<trenchfoot> She looks up, then, and -- "Phrasing."
<Crion> "That's a good pun though."
<banana> "'They specifically told me to deliver it while you were in the shower.'"
<trenchfoot> Nels: "You heard Gendo planning earlier. He might've."
<Crion> "Shinji's much less of a creepy shithead in these versions of the story. If you can imagine."
<VoxPVoxD> "Now see, that's an appropriate amount of distance between active urinals."
<trenchfoot> "Less...? Oh no."
<Crion> "I think in these new movies that's his worst moment."
<trenchfoot> "He was worse...?" Also he earned that."
<Crion> Lauren: "Point of order. He earned it, but not for shit-talking his dad."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart tenses.
<Crion> "Which is why it was delivered."
<Crion> "This Angel design owns."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart shuts his eyes.
<trenchfoot> Nels doesn't respond, just looks fascinated by the animation.
<trenchfoot> Because wow. Wow.
<banana> "I hope that's the decoy city again..."
<trenchfoot> "Let me out, Dad," and "No" - someone needs to kill him. Or at the very least jail him.
<Crion> Lauren's sort of fallen off looking at the movie. Instead she's squeezing Stewart's hand.
<banana> Melanie: "Okay, I'm convinced."
<banana> "Kids shouldn't pilot giant robots. They've made the case."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "What absolute maniac is letting them do this to teenagers."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart squeezes back. His opens his eyes and rubs his free hand across them.
<VoxPVoxD> "The brain is subservient to the soul."
<banana> "Only in the film."
<VoxPVoxD> "If underwear drawers can go flying like that, dualism can be true."
<Crion> Lauren: "The damn UN...every right-wing militia fuck's wildest nightmare fantasy in this."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Am I supposed to know what a positron cannon is? There's a lot of fake things in this but a lot of science sounds fake to me."
<Crion> Lauren: "It's just a big gun."
<VoxPVoxD> "Positrons are real. Positron cannons aren't."
<trenchfoot> "Cool! Those are definitely real."
<Crion> "Might use a lot of energy."
<VoxPVoxD> "Positrons probably won't be on the Chem GED though, so don't worry."
<trenchfoot> "Big guns. Jury is out on positrons."
<banana> Melanie: "What I want to know at this point is like.. will they win, but also, is it worth it."
<trenchfoot> "I suspect they're asking that already."
<VoxPVoxD> "Depends on what Human Instrumentality is."
<VoxPVoxD> "Maybe they're trying to kill God and force their way into Heaven."
<trenchfoot> "They've established that angels are real but I dunno about God."
<banana> "Aren't they already brainwashing him???"
<VoxPVoxD> "You can always brainwash harder."
<trenchfoot> We're in the best place to know.
<banana> "Yeah. Sorry."
<VoxPVoxD> Mood.
<trenchfoot> Dreams.
<trenchfoot> Shit, shit. Fuck. Nels gets up for another drink.
<banana> "At least the sheet didn't drop away or something."
<VoxPVoxD> "Is flat-affected women a thing in anime or is this an on-purpose reversal of the gender stereotype?"
<Crion> Lauren: "More the latter than the former, but there are more characters coming."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "I really need to catch up on a lot of, um, theory? I think I saw the word 'theory' attached to most of these kinds of things..."
<VoxPVoxD> "Misato's shrug has a lot of weight on it there."
<trenchfoot> "Okay, look, I asked this about Tokyo-3. What was the first Impact."
<Crion> Lauren: "It'll sort of explain it."
<VoxPVoxD> "The arrival of the angels maybe?"
<banana> "The obelisks mentioned it but they weren't making themselves very clear."
<VoxPVoxD> "Wwwwwow."
<banana> What
<trenchfoot> "What."
<Crion> Lauren: "Very normal."
<banana> In a neutral tone: "Misato is good at her job."
<trenchfoot> Is there a word for two pyramids stacked on top of one another?
<trenchfoot> Because it seems like there should be.
<Crion> Lauren: "Maybe too good."
<Crion> "Well, I guess the rest of the people still alive don't think so."
<Crion> "God these trains!!"
<trenchfoot> Nels: "That's. Not exactly what he was talking about."
<trenchfoot> "'Both' dying means the two of you. But she didn't care...?"
<banana> "She's just as brainwashed but to a different end."
<Crion> Lauren: "No, she's definitely more brainwashed."
<trenchfoot> "All of the adults in this movie should be in jail."
<Crion> "She LIKES Gendo Ikari!"
<VoxPVoxD> "She's also the only one he's shown any affection to."
<VoxPVoxD> "So if anyone's going to like him..."
<banana> Melanie: "My assumption is that they're siblings and she looks like his dead wife or something. There was that hospital scene and it's the kind of thing they're.. deconstructing? Or reproducing?"
<banana> "Oh, here we go!"
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Speaking of - Misato is the only one to show affection for Shinji."
<trenchfoot> "Everyone else just ignores him or punches him in the face or whatever."
<VoxPVoxD> "Yeah, although them doing that drives him away, which is probably better for him."
<trenchfoot> "Still rude, but yeah."
<banana> "That's a low percent."
<Crion> "Chambering a damn two story tall circuit. SO inefficient! But very cool."
<trenchfoot> "Are any of them going to deal with the fact that he's having a panic attack again?"
<VoxPVoxD> "Completely sexless there."
<VoxPVoxD> "Very weird."
<trenchfoot> WHAT THE FUCK
<banana> :(
<VoxPVoxD> "You can't kill it."
<Crion> "SUCH a shithead."
<banana> "Do you think the whole thing is a plot by Gendo to psychologically destroy his own son for some imagined crime? Like maybe he summoned the Angels somehow."
<trenchfoot> Leaning forward: "Absolutely the worst father. Also I think I wrote this."
<VoxPVoxD> "You can psychologically destroy a teenage boy way easier than this."
<Crion> Lauren to Nels: "Wha?"
<VoxPVoxD> "She means the song."
<trenchfoot> She gestures to her guitar without looking away.
<Crion> "Damn. Nice."
<banana> "Wow."
<banana> Melanie doesn't want to look at the screen. This film is WEIRD and there's no guarantee he's going to manage it...
<trenchfoot> Nels winces at the scream, but -- oh. Oh, wow.
<banana> "Ahahahahaha"
<trenchfoot> So much blood.
<trenchfoot> ...suppose that explains the ocean.
<VoxPVoxD> "It's probably bad to shower the last bastion of humanity in angel's blood, right?"
<banana> "No I bet they're used to it"
<trenchfoot> "...do they still have days out at the beach, because yeah. That'd do it."
<banana> Oh what the fuck.
<trenchfoot> This person seems important??? Who are they. What's going on.
<Crion> "Oh hey there, Kawaru."
<Crion> "And that's the first film!"
<trenchfoot> Nels: "What do you mean 'to be continued...'???"
<banana> Melanie: "That was crazy. I could- there were a lot of references I could tell i was missing, or maybe they were just.. fake things that looked like references."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "The thing about Japan and Christianity was like. Yeah it makes total sense that they'd associate it with bombs. Hence all the explosions being crosses."
<banana> "Ah, you've been reading about Hiroshima."
<trenchfoot> Slight frown: "My textbook didn't really go into depth about it beyond the fact that it happened. I want a Japanese perspective on the whole event, because I bet 'bomb dropped, war ended' is extremely not how they view it."
<banana> Melanie: "Maybe we just got one."
<banana> She shakes herself a little, having basically not moved for an hour and a half. "Wow. They aren't all like that, right?"
<trenchfoot> Nels looks over to Lauren and Stewart, because they would know.
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart's getting himself a drink. "The one anime I watched was just a bunch of dudes screaming and shooting energy beams at each other."
<VoxPVoxD> "Evangelion has a reputation for being sort of, uh, offbeat."
<banana> Melanie: "If we are being 'trolled', it's only what we deserve."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Is that what they call cartoons now? They're all animay? Like animation but shorter, I guess."
<banana> "Still, it was good. A lot of it felt like.. totally insane and well-animated situations but with people reacting in really normal, sensical ways to this unexplained premise."
<VoxPVoxD> "Anime is used to refer specifically to cartoons from Japan, done in this sort of art style."
<VoxPVoxD> "My understanding is that there's entire anime series that are just about high school eating toast and stuff. It's a medium, more than a genre."
<trenchfoot> "Oh, yes, also, it was absolutely gorgeous. They've come a long way."
<Crion> Lauren gets some more snacks and busies herself setting up 2.22.
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Okay, okay, this is a sequel, but - they let him - wait. They didn't let him back in the robot."
<Crion> Lauren: "This is...someone else, yeah."
<trenchfoot> "Maybe Gendo got replaced with a good father."
<trenchfoot> Okay, this one isn't her fault.
<VoxPVoxD> "I'm suspicious of anyone who has fun doing this."
<trenchfoot> Gross.
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Why does she think this is fun."
<trenchfoot> Oh, there's the horrible blood fountain.
<trenchfoot> "First and only person to think that it's bad to make teens fight in wars."
<Crion> Lauren: "Because she's incredibly healthy and normal, obviously."
<trenchfoot> Cross again.
<trenchfoot> "Holy shit that's a lot of graves."
<Crion> "That's Mari! She's kind of like the Jimothy of this remake. Wasn't in the show."
<Crion> "...Jameson told you about Jimothy, right?"
<trenchfoot> "...no...?" Nels looks away from the screen to look at Lauren.
<Crion> "Shinji..."
<trenchfoot> "Christ, what an asshole."
<VoxPVoxD> "Misato is trying so hard."
<VoxPVoxD> "Be honest with yourself, and agree with me!"
<Crion> Lauren, doing a Ron Howard voice: "Narrator: He was not."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "The blood-dimmed tides that everyone just casually - okay, was this considered subtle at the time? With the cross imagery."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart smiles at that. The reference, not the grisly destruction.
<VoxPVoxD> "No."
<VoxPVoxD> "The subtlety is all in the opaque storytelling. The imagery is just straight up violence."
<VoxPVoxD> "Haha this riff."
<Crion> "Boom."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "The blood explosions are. They're a thing."
<VoxPVoxD> "So this is the best and coolest one."
<Crion> Lauren: "She's okay."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart snorts.
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Langley?"
<trenchfoot> "She's... CIA?"
<VoxPVoxD> "'First Girl' and 'Second Girl' seem to have more significance than just being- wow."
<Crion> Lauren: "She's a lot of things."
<VoxPVoxD> "What a dick!"
<trenchfoot> "Wait, why is he talking with these guys. His first and only interaction was getting punched in the face."
<Crion> Lauren: "Nah, they were with him in the tube."
<Crion> "They became friends."
<VoxPVoxD> "He punched that guy back. This is how male bonding works."
<trenchfoot> "Ohhhh, right. Men."
<trenchfoot> "I don't trust this guy either."
<VoxPVoxD> "Facial hair: a sign of evil?"
<Crion> Lauren: "Ponytail and stubble basically means dirtbag, yeah."
<Crion> "As seen."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Misato should have fought him."
<trenchfoot> "What a jerk!"
<Crion> Lauren: "Not wrong."
<VoxPVoxD> "It's kind of weird getting what I assume is a regular anime comedy beat in the middle of this Christological nightmare."
<trenchfoot> "Is Christological a word I'll need to know in the future?"
<VoxPVoxD> "No."
<trenchfoot> "Good, because I already forgot it."
<Crion> Lauren: "Back to what you were saying before, Asuka here is much more...normal anime gender role beats."
<Crion> "See?"
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart nods. "...really?"
<VoxPVoxD> "She's like... an archetype? The cranky jerk?"
<Crion> "Yep."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "The future is weird."
<trenchfoot> "Awful father."
<trenchfoot> "That's normal, at least."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Should I know what the Dead Sea Scrolls are or is that another made up thing?"
<Crion> Lauren: "Hello!"
<Crion> "They're both real and made up, Nels."
<VoxPVoxD> The creepy dude is cool.
<Crion> "That is to say, something called the Dead Sea Scrolls exist, but the version here have fictional powers."
<trenchfoot> "...have we checked the real ones out to see if they have powers?"
<Crion> "Poor penguin."
<VoxPVoxD> "I mean. We haven't."
<trenchfoot> "Also, is this the first time we've seen like. Real water?"
<Crion> "Hahahah."
<Crion> "Yeah."
<VoxPVoxD> "Okay so implicitly First Impact is like the origin of humanity, Second Impact is the apocalypse that turns our world into Evangelion world. And Third Impact is...? The Rapture?"
<trenchfoot> "???"
<Crion> "Rei...you're so obvious."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart missed that entirely, speculating on the lore.
<trenchfoot> "She's rude. And he's an idiot."
<Crion> "Yeah, kind of her thing."
<VoxPVoxD> "Also the one non-Japanese character? Maybe that's just what we're like."
<trenchfoot> "I'm not that big of a jerk!"
<Crion> "They don't have the best cultural experience with us. Though she's German-Japanese, I think, not American."
<VoxPVoxD> "It's early yet, we haven't seen how specifically she's as weird and sad as the rest of them. She's got time to come back down to earth."
<Crion> "That GUITAR!"
<trenchfoot> Nels: "They just fire off - I'm assuming the N is for 'nuclear'? Just, all the time."
<Crion> "Nuclear 2!"
<trenchfoot> "The sequel."
<trenchfoot> "I don't know who to support, here."
<VoxPVoxD> "Is it really possible to have a vendetta against alien beings attempting to destroy all of humanity?"
<Crion> "If you're the only survivor of ground zero for second impact, well, maybe?"
<trenchfoot> Pointed silence.
<Crion> "That kid's hopeless."
<Crion> "Good sprinter's stance, though."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Oh, wow - did they ever make cars safe enough to do that? Because that was cool as hell."
<Crion> "Not...really."
<trenchfoot> "Sprinting along the walls of the thing I mean."
<Crion> "Oh yeah, driving on inclines in races happens."
<Crion> "Got yerself a bad case of stigmata, there."
<trenchfoot> "In the past - oh, Christ - but they were like, trying to race long distances and fighting their calls falling apart."
<trenchfoot> cars*
<trenchfoot> Holy shit.
<trenchfoot> Uh, pretty easy to see why the ocean is red now.
<Crion> "Whew."
<VoxPVoxD> "Oh fuck you, dude."
<Crion> "The bare minimum, folks!"
<Crion> Lauren, deadpan: "She's so considerate."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart's frown is deep.
<trenchfoot> Nels: "He is. But also she's still a rude jerk."
<trenchfoot> "They have these characters regularly??"
<Crion> "Who, Asukas? Yeah. Rei's a different trope. Both are kind of subversions of it. Rei more than Asuka."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "And people... like them??"
<Crion> "They're mainly in anime for boys."
<Crion> "Anime for girls have similarly uh. Broad. Stereotypes for the guys."
<trenchfoot> "Is this like the thing I got told not to read but did anyway? It had a whip involved which seemed weird."
<VoxPVoxD> "The what?"
<Crion> "Though that silver-haired guy is very similar to one you'd see in--"
<Crion> Lauren manages not to choke on her drink. "Well I wouldn't know about that."
<VoxPVoxD> "Jesus."
<trenchfoot> Nels, blandly: "David Smitten, I'm pretty sure. I forget the name of the book, but it wasn't any good."
<Crion> Lauren: "All in all, in the end, it's probably a good thing Shinji didn't grow up with his dad."
<Crion> "Sigh."
<Crion> "Hi, Mari."
<VoxPVoxD> "Shinji has the worst luck."
<trenchfoot> "I feel like you shouldn't say 'enter the country covertly' in front of a civillian?"
<Crion> "Doesn't he just."
<trenchfoot> "What the fuck."
<trenchfoot> "What the fuck."
<VoxPVoxD> "Man this poor kid. Puberty's hard enough as it is."
<Crion> "Yeah so Mari's a big part of the later movies but she just wasn't in the original show. So her literally parachuting into the--Kaji."
<trenchfoot> "He's right but also that's still fucking creepy."
<trenchfoot> "That is the wrong question to ask Shinji."
<trenchfoot> "Because no, he doesn't, but also it isn't healthy."
<VoxPVoxD> "So far like the one character he hasn't been in a sexually compromised position with is his dad."
<VoxPVoxD> "And the scientist I guess."
<Crion> Lauren: "Probably don't go on dates with dirtbags in their thirties, Shinji. Usually they end a lot worse than doing farm work!"
<trenchfoot> Nels: "The teen daughter couldn't possibly fall in love with someone."
<Crion> Lauren: "Nice save."
<trenchfoot> "Is this -- you said tropes? Is this one of those again?"
<VoxPVoxD> "This is worrying because if she made him soup then by the logic of every other scene she's going to spill it on his pants or something."
<Crion> "Horny Anno!"
<trenchfoot> Nels: "They sure find a bunch of excuses to show naked ladies."
<VoxPVoxD> "Says a lot about who they think their audience is."
<VoxPVoxD> "Kind of a one-two punch. You draw the teenage boys in with the cheesecake, and then you get 'em with the sustained psychic trauma."
<Crion> "It's actually considered kind of daring how much naked Shinji and Kawaru there is."
<Crion> "That's the silver-haired guy."
<trenchfoot> "The moon man? Yeah, I can see it."
<trenchfoot> "Those birds are probably right, by the by. They're fleeing the city."
<VoxPVoxD> To Lauren: "What's that Seele motto there?"
<Crion> "Let's see if I can get the pronunciation right."
<Crion> "Überm sternenzelt richtet Gott, wie wir gerichtet."
<Crion> "God judges Heaven as we have, is the rough translation."
<trenchfoot> One of those fancy European languages.
<Crion> Lauren: "Awkward!"
<VoxPVoxD> Lauren's so smart. "Probably the one thing crueler than training child soldiers is like... firing child soldiers."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "I feel like putting them in an elevator together is mean."
<trenchfoot> "Though --" There's the slap. "To who, I don't know."
<VoxPVoxD> "Getting down to what really matters."
<Crion> Lauren: "His room is getting better, at least."
<trenchfoot> "Do you think he's ever going to realize his father doesn't care about him?"
<VoxPVoxD> "Well yeah, if girls are going to show up spontaneously you have to decorate."
<Crion> That gets a chuckle.
<trenchfoot> Nels, curiously: "Wait, why?"
<VoxPVoxD> "The number of shots where Misato's ass or legs are just hanging out in the frame for no reason."
<Crion> Lauren: "I mean. There's a reason."
<VoxPVoxD> "Right."
<Crion> Intoning: "Horny Anno."
<trenchfoot> "Is she - she isn't saying anything?"
<Crion> "That fuckin' moonwalk."
<trenchfoot> "That kid sucks."
<Crion> "Horny teen congrats moonwalk."
<Crion> "Eh, he's fine."
<Crion> "He hasn't done anything actively shitty besides teening."
<trenchfoot> Also, holy shit, he's - at most - 5 years younger than she is.
<trenchfoot> Like, in terms of years lived through.
<VoxPVoxD> "Asuka..."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "This all seems extremely insincere."
<Crion> "Sigh."
<trenchfoot> "I feel like having a cartoon character complain about perverts designing their costume doesn't actually count."
<VoxPVoxD> "What the fuck??"
<trenchfoot> "What in the name of --"
<Crion> "The angels are getting smarter."
<trenchfoot> "Why is Gendo Ikari still allowed to run this"
<VoxPVoxD> "He gets results."
<trenchfoot> "Does he???"
<Crion> Lauren: "He's batting 1.000."
<VoxPVoxD> "Seele seems happy with him."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "He should still be fired for making children fight wars."
<Crion> "Mmmmmm."
<trenchfoot> "There was - it ended badly. You would think they'd have learned, even in fiction."
<VoxPVoxD> "JUST FUCKING LIE TO HIM!"
<VoxPVoxD> "Jesus."
<trenchfoot> "What the fuck."
<Crion> "'Won't kill your friend? Well, you'll get a front row seat while your body does it while you scream. Love, Dad.'"
<VoxPVoxD> "Weird time for a fuckin, Simon and Garfunkel song or whatever."
<trenchfoot> "This one isn't my fault."
<trenchfoot> "Oh, Christ."
<trenchfoot> "Oh, Christ."
<VoxPVoxD> "What the FUCK!"
<trenchfoot> Nels gets up without a word to get a drink.
<Crion> "That feeling when you choke out your own son for making him kill his friend."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart exhales. "She lived?"
<Crion> "After a fashion."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Wait, they're court-martialing him for--"
<trenchfoot> "Dreams again?"
<trenchfoot> "I know I've said it multiple times but his dad sucks."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "First time he didn't hesitate stepping over a boundary."
<Crion> "Horny Annnooo!!!"
<trenchfoot> Nels nods solemnly.
<Crion> "What a cut."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "Ah jeez."
<trenchfoot> Nels is back to leaning forward and just - watching.
<VoxPVoxD> Uh oh.
<trenchfoot> "Wait, the song."
<trenchfoot> "The - oh no."
<trenchfoot> "Oh no."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Oh no."
<Crion> "Whew."
<VoxPVoxD> "She crawled over to him again."
<trenchfoot> "What the fuck."
<trenchfoot> NOT THE QUESTION HE SHOULD ASK
<Crion> "Hi."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Oh my God."
<Crion> "This is where it breaks with the show."
<Crion> "In the show, he loses this fight."
<VoxPVoxD> "Why would they change it?"
<Crion> "Well. In a different way. You'll see."
<trenchfoot> "What the fuck is going on?"
<VoxPVoxD> To Nels: "The brain is subservient to the soul."
<Crion> "Couple of reasons. First is that Anno was having a breakdown when he scripted the end of the show. Like, went in-patient afterwards. Second is that there's a good argument this is a SEQUEL to the show."
<Crion> "Kid's got the left arm of God."
<trenchfoot> "The halo is - maybe - on the nose --"
<VoxPVoxD> "Yeah that's the one thing that's too much."
<trenchfoot> Pouting: "That's not what what I said!"
<Crion> Lauren: "Nah. The EVAs were always repurposed angels."
<trenchfoot> Nels, weakly: "Are they all like this?"
<VoxPVoxD> "All what?"
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Cartoons. Movies. All of these."
<VoxPVoxD> "Nnnnno."
<VoxPVoxD> "No they very much are not."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "God dman it. I wrote this too."
<Crion> Lauren, into the silence as the credits roll: "...And the story is half over."
<VoxPVoxD> "The end of the world is the midpoint?!"
<Crion> "Which is weird! Because that's where the show ends."
<Crion> "In the show, he loses but they backdoor the Human Instrumentality Project into action and the...world still ends? Like I said, he was having a breakdown."
<trenchfoot> "It makes sense as an end point, but... also... most things end on a positive note? And this is the opposite."
<banana> Melanie stirs. This time she was even stiller, barely human-appearing at all. There's a lot to process, but having decided it's impossible, she can just not do that.
<Crion> "Shinji actually 'saving' Rei is kind of a positive note, given how the other two previous endings are.
<banana> "Maybe it's revenge."
<Crion> "
<banana> "On the viewers. Give us all the breakdown this time."
<Crion> Lauren: "Anyway, 3.33 has pirates and a musical number. Please look forward to it!"
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart blinks.
<trenchfoot> Nels: "There are more?"
<trenchfoot> "Wait, no, you said that, but also... what???"
<VoxPVoxD> "If the story's half-over, then logically there are two more movies."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "That is actually, literally, insane.
<trenchfoot> "
<trenchfoot> FUCK she forgot about moon man.
<banana> Melanie: "It does seem weird that someone would put so much human time and effort into- what"
<Crion> "So there's a theory which is that the movies are the sequel to the show. Groundhog Day style. And that line -- "this time I will make you happy" -- is one of the linchpins."{
<banana> "Well, the last preview was totally misleading so this one probably doesn't mean anything."
<Crion> "'Now then, more fan service coming next time!'"
<VoxPVoxD> "If that's fan service, what does fan spite look like?"
<banana> "I think I've come around to 'what the hell'. The first one was insane but pretty amazing and it felt like an almost-complete story with some loose ends... now there's just so many new characters and half of it's pointless because everything is ending?"
<Crion> "So the next movie is Evangelion 3.33: You Can (Not) Redo, and the last movie is Evangelion 3.0+1.0, set to come out middle of next year."
<banana> "At least Gendo seems to have everything under control, but he's not sharing the plan with us."
<VoxPVoxD> "There's no way Gendo actually has everything under control."
<Crion> To Stewart: "Fan spite looks like End of Evangelion, where Anno got so angry at his fans that he had Shinji, as a self-insert for them, jerk off over Rei's hospital bed in the first thirty minutes and end the movie getting choked out by Asuka on a beach as the world ended."
<banana> Melanie disagrees. "The end of the world and the ascension of a new form of life is clearly something you can script. After all, this Anno guy did it."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "..."
<VoxPVoxD> "And then the fans got one over on him in the end and decided that being choked by Asuka was fan service too?"
<trenchfoot> "I mean, would."
<Crion> Lauren shrugs. "In the end, he is the same as them, just more talented."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "That's so much work to put into something you don't respect."
<trenchfoot> "It was weird, but also, like, he got to distill and weaponize his anxiety."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "He could've just had a son."
<trenchfoot> "I think Gendo demonstrates that he absolutely should not have."
<VoxPVoxD> "But he could have."
<banana> "What a weird filmchild though. The central contradiction is like.. as you say, Stewart, it's the commitment. This was really good animation? And exciting big monster fights, all the military tech, et cetera, it does the stuff you'd unironically want from an action.. anime."
<banana> "While also sort of telling you in every frame to fuck off and never watch those?"
<Crion> Lauren: "There's a wider, larger tradition of that, sorta. 'Anti-war' movies that are fundamentally big-budget action films."
<banana> Melanie: "Or like.. 'fine, is this what you want, you animals'. And then Mari's tits fall out again or something."
<trenchfoot> Nels fetches her guitar. It's - it feels like a standard song to play while Evangelion is happening but it wasn't in any of the movies... but really... Her fingers play without her thinking.
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "I guess that's the problem with satire, isn't it. You try to take something to an absurd extreme, it's just gonna sail over people's heads."
<trenchfoot> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oS_yNsDsbaQ
<VoxPVoxD> "And they go 'wow, cool robot!'"
<banana> "There's so much stuff that's actually interesting and like, food for thought.."
<Crion> Lauren: "...!"
<Crion> "That's the show's theme song, Nels!"
<banana> "But what kind of master plan involves having your son eat his only friend and then have his other only friend tear his arm off in front of you so that you get covered in a wave of blood?"
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "I guess if you're trying to create some kind of transcendent human messiah out of dead gods and alien biomass then they need to get fucked up."
<banana> "So in the TV show version.. were powerful looking things introduced more than ten minutes before they got blown to shit?"
<trenchfoot> Nels doesn't falter. "Wrote it." This part is tricky- she has to stop talking for a bit, but eventually: "Does the - it has words, right? I didn't write any, but..."
<Crion> Lauren: "Yeah, the full show was like...13 hours? Angels would usually get a full episode, and there were a bunch of episodes just about school stuff without any angels in them."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart plays on his phone for Nels: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A6r79HxmKw8
<banana> Melanie listens to Nels for a while. "Eva pilots considered as an alienee.. no. They're present in society, more so than they want to be. Every part of the world holds onto them."
<banana> "Being human is like.. the point, both for them and their robots? In order to not be human anymore? Because you can't become without being."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "I didn't speak that language or - why are there horns. It'd be like, 'like an angel with cruel and merciless intent, go forth young boy and you'll become a legend!'"
<banana> Melanie: "He doesn't want to be one. He just wants one person to see him, ideally his dad."
<VoxPVoxD> To Melanie: "They serve an explicit societal role, even. You can't be an alienee and also be like, a publicly famous soldier."
<banana> "It's not a very Lost apocalypse, is it?"
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "I wonder what the willworkers make of it."
<banana> Melanie: "Hashtag relationship goals."
<VoxPVoxD> "Jesuit talked about reaching Heaven through violence. Is that 'human instrumentality'?"
<banana> "In that they think the birthright of humanity is to no longer be human, like our entire experience of being is a meat puppet to shuck."
<Crion> Lauren: "The mages probably see a lot more Seer in that movie than Pentacle, if I had to guess."
<banana> "Slightly weird request."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "The ones we talk to, anyway."
<banana> Melanie: "Do you know somewhere I could argue about this show on the Internet?"
<Crion> Lauren cackles. "Absolutely."
<banana> "...I'd like to see what people think about it but more importantly how they put things, the reaction."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "One time Lauren showed me this thing where a guy was talking about the Star Wars prequels and everyone was melting down at him for saying things like they were mean to the robots."
<trenchfoot> "This all reminds me. Speaking of movies involving, well, us... Could we do another movie night? Labyrinth."
<Crion> She cackles louder. "He rules. He rules!!!"
<banana> "Sure, what's that one?"
<VoxPVoxD> "With David Bowie?"
<banana> "..is it quieter?"
<trenchfoot> "A musician becomes a goblin king and everyone has to pretend they don't realize it's David Bowie."
<Crion> Lauren: "I don't think I've seen it, so. Yeah, sure.
<Crion> "
<banana> Over the course of the conversation Melanie's resumed her nearly-human shape, more like a dryad than a standing hardwood. The pace of the animes was in some ways easier to follow than a Hollywood film with snappy dialogue - much of it was spectacle and the emotional strokes were very broad - but taking in that much sensory input didn't leave her with a lot of energy. Hopefully Nels's
<banana> taste will be less mechanised-catastrophic.
<trenchfoot> She... mostly liked it? It was A Lot. Like, a lot a lot.
<banana> This is something even Melanie would never say out loud, but she wonders: does Lauren Ipsum see anything of her worldspider in the war-factory vision of Japan and its assault by vast living robots?
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart's light-years ahead on refusing to even wonder it.
<Crion>
<Crion>
<Crion>
<Crion>
<Crion>
<Crion>
<Crion>
<Crion> The first week of December is here. Sooner or later...probably sooner...it'll be time.
<Crion> Lauren's more or less put her security into Stewart's hands at this point, but she's been suggesting she spend more and more time at the Wherehouse as the calendar turns over. After all, it's not only safer, but much easier to fix if something barrels in looking like an 80s movie star with massive guns.
<Crion> What's everyone been up to since Thanksgiving, though? There's other stuff going on in Baltimore on both sides of the Hedge than a rogue Huntsman.
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart resists at first - the 'real world' feels more secure and safer to him... but Lauren's right, and it's not long before they're spending more time than not in the Wherehouse.
<VoxPVoxD> When he's not doing this, he's working... while thinking about this. The new Path of Exile league is just around the corner - hopefully the Huntsman hits before the 9th or so - and that'll mean 16, 20 hour league start streams. A lot of the preparation for this is just being as healthy as possible in the run-up so it doesn't destroy him too badly.
<dammitwho> It's also nice to be around friends! :)
<VoxPVoxD> When Stewart's stressed, he's deeply ambivalent about being around people. And he's stressed more or less all the time now. But the others do make it easier.
<dammitwho> Maggie: "So yeah, you can pretty much put sausage in any kind of pastry or bread-based dish."
<trenchfoot> Nels has been idly working away at her schoolwork, mostly, though she's also been hanging around the Wherehouse more. Her apartment's starting to feel lonely without the others' voices, or Steve's honking. More often than not, the others can hear her humming away or plucking at the guitar or finding some bit of culture she missed out on to watch or listen to.
<CBN> Tony's spent a chunk of his post-Thanksgiving slowly but surely replacing bits and pieces of the Wherehouse's furnishings with castoff parts and so-great-as-to-be-better-not-asking-questions Black Friday deals. That's how the fridge has a working lightbulb. That's how the burners on the stove look like they've ever been clean. And most importantly, that's how Tony's bachelor hovel has a framework of wooden studs where there will
<CBN> eventually be walls.
<CBN> For now, there's enough wall-stud there to hang a calendar. Did you know how cheap calendars are when it's already late November? They practically give that year away.
<CBN> And that's why right now, he's re-hanging the rug-walls, over clotheslines that've been anchored into the studs. It sure is "an aesthetic."
<banana> How's Melanie been? To whoever's around: "Hey, watch this."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart's curled up on a couch with his earbuds in, but he takes them out when Melanie looks demonstrative out of the corner of his eye. "Yeah?"
<dammitwho> Hmm. Melanie gonna start juggling things it is unwise to juggle?
<banana> She's wearing a pair of slightly knobbly gloves and, now just taking them out of a pocket, oval orange-shaded glasses.
<banana> Standing behind a kitchen countertop, Melanie.. slumps, lacing her fingertwigs together and resting her face on her hands, looking over the decorative glasses. Hopefully they catch the light. "Inadequate."
<dammitwho> ???
<banana> "Every one of you is a disappointment."
<CBN> Tony observes this exchange, completely lacking any context for the reference. But he politely stops hammering into his almost-wall for a moment.
<VoxPVoxD> ...
<CBN> Tony clears his throat. "Is this a movie? I haven't seen it."
<VoxPVoxD> "That's really good. You're really good at that."
<Crion> Lauren is watching, semi-baffled.
<trenchfoot> Nels snickers. Also, for once she isn't the one out of the loop about pop culture. Weird feeling.
<banana> Not working? Well, Stewart gets it. Melanie pushes the nonfunctional shades up her nose with one hand, glares a moment longer, then gives up and smiles.
<banana> "I found these at a Dollar Tree!"
<banana> "Nels got it, right?"
<CBN> Tony: "Do they do a second Halloween after Christmas now?"
<trenchfoot> She plucks a few bars from the song she played at the end of the movie, last time.
<VoxPVoxD> To Tony: "Yeah, it's a movie. Melanie's doing an impression of the main character's evil dad."
<banana> To Tony: "We watched this crazy movie, or series of movies. Really I should have gathered deepening shadow behind me and worn a uniform jacket."
<banana> "That dad is the main character. He's the only guy who knows what's going on."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "He's also the worst. Just. The worst."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "Knowing what's going on is hardly a prereq for protagonism."
<Crion> To recap for both Stewart's and this narrator's benefit: he (and Lauren, and the Wherehouse at large) have a standing agreement with John of the Falls to bring the Huntsman to his door, his Gate of Horn, in the Hedge -- and John of the Falls will then somehow provide them and the Huntsman access to the dreams of Rebecca Sarah Connor, an eight-year-old who has never seen the movie Terminator
<Crion> but never the less dreams of metal skeleton men crushing human skulls every night.
<CBN> Tony: "Oh! Like the Shining? Weird movie to franchise but I guess everyone's out of ideas."
<Crion> The hard part, of course, will be convincing the Huntsman.
<dammitwho> Do the dreams frighten Rebecca, or has she gotten used to it? Huuurm.
<trenchfoot> Nels: "No, this was one of those Japanese cartoons. Anime? It was called Evangelion, but they had weird names beyond that."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "It's sort of like the Shining, if the main character was Danny, who was puberty age and every interaction with a ghost was like the lady in the bathtub."
<trenchfoot> Nels can (not) remember.
<banana> "It depends on whether you're trying to effect effective change though." Odd to see the whole world in an orange light. It's like there's a blaze somewhere in the background. "Narratively yeah you're absolutely right, people bumble through and like, deal with stuff. The heroism of instinct."
<Crion> Lauren snort laughs. "Sorry, I just imagined Smitten and Smote as the twins."
<VoxPVoxD> "'Come play with us'."
<Crion> "But with a backbeat."
<banana> "If someone reacts with compassion and skill we're like wow, good protagonist! But isn't that only for stories? If you want to get something done in the real world and you don't have vital context, the chances are..." Well, whatever.
<VoxPVoxD> "I dunno, Mel. What if that's just a just-so story told to us by the people who have power by accident to justify their being assholes?"
<banana> "It's not working if so. Like sure maybe I'm convinced that only if you have power can you do stuff, but the stuff they do.. it's not good stuff. Some of the worst stuff."
<CBN> Tony clears his throat but says this while busying himself with the wall, "I'd think if anyone would know that just because the story's about you, doesn't mean you should have stories about you, it'd be us."
<banana> Ooh.
<VoxPVoxD> "Everybody's story is about them. It's just... who can make other people listen to their stories?"
<banana> "Well.. that does situate protagonism as totally distinct from success. Oh dear."
<CBN> Tony dusts off his hands and turns back to the room. "So, anyone doing anything interesting tonight? Place is too clean now, I gotta get out of here for a bit."
<Crion> One thing John wasn't able to help you with was any sort of early warning system for the Huntsman's return. Did Stewart look into anything like that over the last few weeks?
<VoxPVoxD> Yeah. He knows about the Herald, obviously, but that only goes so far. But he's got plenty of people in the Freehold he can bother with questions, and he's got the Book... did he learn anything new?
<banana> Melanie: "We could go for a walk. It's pig weather, but there's always Baltimore?"
<Crion> Probably. What was he looking for?
<VoxPVoxD> Probably the main thing was some kind of way of predicting where a Huntsman will re-form, and then some kind of way of monitoring that place.
<trenchfoot> Nels: "That depends on our long-term plan, here. If we're okay there, then I've got nothing pressing."
<banana> It would be nice to regularly have something on, somewhere to go... sort of. Melanie's not sure about that, actually. Parties and people are great, what she wants on some level, always has.. but she can easily fill any number of hours with work, there are dangers and stresses that didn't previously exist, and also, Tony's right: trading agency away for safety or victory is entirely
<banana> worthwhile.
<banana> She looks inquisitively at Lauren and Stewart (from behind orange glasses) to see whether they've got input. On the 'long-term plan'.
<VoxPVoxD> "Long-term plan for what?"
<trenchfoot> Nels glances over to Lauren, before looking back to Stewart. "The Huntsman."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "I mean... there's not really a long-term plan for a Huntsman. We had a month to prepare, now the month is up... now we're waiting for a sign. Then we settle it."
<Crion> The Book is actually extremely helpful in this regard, conversationally laying out both the way that the Huntsman 'reforms' in the Hedge (they're said to step out of the thorn-walls themselves, having become tangled there through expulsion from some sort of special portal from Arcadia itself which only goes in the one direction) and various means of telling if it is about. The Herald may or
<Crion> may not return, but if it does return is usually much less confrontational than it was on initial meeting; Huntsmen generally take no notice, good or ill, of hobs and hobs have no particular aversion to them, as the Huntsmen are never any real danger to the Hedge's native denizens, so hobs make excellent informants; and there is a certain goblin fruit, The Pursuer's Mandrake, that can be
<Crion> planted in Hedge soil -- and will scream when approached by a Huntsman at his work.
<Crion> Lauren's face gets a bit pinched at the word, but she's been very encouraging of them speaking freely about this in front of her, instead of treating it like she's got cancer.
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart goes on: "We've got, you know - Tony's friends in the Hedge are keeping an eye out for us, there's that Goblin Fruit we were able to plant outside... but we just gotta wait."
<VoxPVoxD> "There's no way to make this part of it faster."
<VoxPVoxD> Or easier.
<trenchfoot> Well then. "Then I've got nothing planned. Movie night again?" Or trying to track down family members? That's maybe a solo mission.
<CBN> Tony: "Anything you all can think of that'll make the um...the Huntsman-part? A little easier on us? Like if the guys in JAWS didn't just hop on the boat and hope they could blow its head up."
<CBN> Tony: "Since I've been blasted chunks out of targets with a shotgun outside in my spare time, but I dunno how well that trick's gonna work after the other time. Hopefully at all, but like someone once said, hope is not a strategy."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "Hard to say for sure. Some of it'll depend on what form they take next."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Do they - sorry, I suppose I never thought to ask. It won't be that same metal skeleton thing?"
<banana> "And the main thing is still to hold it off or hold it down so you guys can talk to it?"
<VoxPVoxD> "It'll be an iteration on that. Yeah."
<Crion> There's a flurry of wings and honks as Steve almost tumbles into the Wherehouse. You don't need Tony to tell you that he's agitated and has news for Stewart, though Tony does have the familiarity to know immediately that it's about Lauren's Huntsman.
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart's on his feet as soon as he sees the hob.
<Crion> Oddly, he's also been proudly calling himself "Business Steve" ever since sealing the deal with Stewart last week.
<banana> Wait, how much did Stewart pay?
<banana> What deal?
<trenchfoot> Does Steve have a little bow tie? Perhaps a top hat?
<Crion> Not at the moment. He's been working.
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "What do you got?"
<Crion> Anyway, the news: Lauren's Huntsman is back, and has been for a couple hours at least...but he doesn't seem to be actively hunting. Or at least not hunting Lauren. Instead he's been wandering the local Hedge, investigating doors, and even went to Notgnixel Market to examine a wide array of hedgespun objects that might approximate guns (he bought nothing, and is still apparently well-armed).
<Crion> None of the Mandrakes have started shrieking, so you know he hasn't been in this area yet -- but surely he'll make his way over eventually.
<CBN> Tony disappears into the kitchen, reappearing moments later to toss Business Steve a beer. "Steve!"
<Crion> Business Steve will indulge himself with a well-earned beer.
<banana> Melanie strips off the white gloves absent-mindedly. "Reconnaisance, or curiosity. Last time it didn't bother to find out what it was walking into..."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "If it's taking the time to prepare, we should go meet it now."
<dammitwho> Maggie: "Maybe it's stuck doing the movie stuff? The robit didn't get blown up in the nightclub in the movie, so now it has no idea what to do?"
<VoxPVoxD> "Since we're ready and they aren't."
<banana> "Maggie, have you got more of that webstuff?"
<banana> "For prisoner transport... it's the Hedge, we can arrange something if it weighs too much to carry."
<trenchfoot> Nels has retreated to go fetch her kevlar vest and revolver.
<dammitwho> Maggie: "Sure. I have to leave the Wherehouse at night to catch more spiders, but I've got some."
<CBN> Tony: "So we aren't stepping all over each other...what's our plan for talking it into doing the...the thing. That whole thing."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart looks at Lauren.
<Crion> She's staring at a point at the wall. "So I guess I have to go talk to it. Him."
<banana> Melanie briefly considers offering to support an indoor spider farm. No. "If you offer it the heart quest, we can test sincerity with oaths or the Beers of Bacchus."
<banana> "Will it be difficult? The creature in and of itself, Lauren, is it something you could communicate with if it wasn't hunting you down?"
<Crion> Lauren: "I mean...if he's looking for something, and it's not me, there's only one other thing it can really be, right?" She looks over at Stewart. "Right?"
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "Right."
<VoxPVoxD> "They've got two competing impulses. One is the Title, and the Title wants Lauren. The other is its own desire, which is to get his heart back."
<VoxPVoxD> "In such close proximity to the heart... we've got a good chance of doing this without anyone getting hurt."
<Crion> Lauren: "...What happens to him when he gets his heart back?"
<VoxPVoxD> "Then the Title will be purged, and they'll be themselves again. The oath we'll make will still stand, but he'll just... go back, probably. Unless it doesn't want to."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "What do we do if they don't? Want to, that is."
<banana> Also, go back to where?
<VoxPVoxD> "Well, as long as it keeps to the oath... that's not really any of our business, is it?"
<Crion> Lauren's sigh isn't one of resignation, but resolve. "I should probably get the vest Gerald gave me, then."
<Crion> She'll return wearing police bulletproof vest with the BPD logo taken off of it. To Stewart: "I'm ready when you are, babe." She glances uncertainly around the rest of the room. She's not about to directly ask you all to come, but...
<dammitwho> Maggie's getting her own vest. Safety first!
<banana> It's a room full of Lost visibly making Grim Preparations. Come on, Ipsum.
<CBN> Tony's ready to go as soon as he pulls on a heavier coat, grabs his gun, and slugs a beer.
<Crion> She's from the Midwest, the Doesn't Want To Be a Bother (While Being a Bother) energy is very strong with her.
<trenchfoot> We don't abandon friends.
<banana> Melanie: "I want to thank the kings for what they did, this plan to forcibly create a new motley."
<banana> "Not only has it been... personally helpful... I've noticed that so many changelings are loners. I get it, really, we have cracked shells and soft underbellies. But together.. we're strong. Really strong."
<Crion> Ah, speech, ah, she's blushing.
<Crion> "...I just wanna say thanks to everyone."
<banana> Melanie just grins hugely at that.
<CBN> Tony: "What're friends for?"
<Crion> Lauren won't be going armed. Her decision. She doubts it'll make a difference and this is, after all, something of a peace offering.
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart's got his gun, but in his mind actually drawing it, much less firing it, would be a catastrophic failure and sign of impending doom.
<trenchfoot> Nels only has her piece for comfort and a general sense of protection on their journey. If she does have to draw it...
<Crion> When you're all ready, Business Steve will lead you out into the Hedge and see you on your way with a honk.
<Crion> From thereon, it's Tony's show.
<trenchfoot> She briefly considers honking in reply, but Nels decides that maybe she would accidentally say something rude in goose or just generally mean, and settles for patting him on the head instead.
<CBN> Tony gives Steve the equivalent of a high-five, without the awkward hand-to-wing contact, and sets out at the lead. The Hedge is weird (Wyrd) but even then, he's been around the not-really-city-blocks enough times to know how to find Something Worse, and (at least this time), do it without the Hedge itself paying much mind. Which, hey, small favors.
<Crion> You're looking for a stretch of neighborhood (Hedgehood?) way up Charles Street, then over into Hampden. The Hedge is a bit more twee here...and a bit less. Hampden was a steel town once, before Baltimore grew and took it inside city limits, and for each fake winery-and-dinery there are some abandoned, boarded up "homes" lining the Hedge wall. Still, nothing as gauche as like, empty broken
<Crion> heroin vials crunching underfoot. So that's something.
<VoxPVoxD> Putting the Gentry in gentrification.
<banana> Melanie's concession to armour is a jacket that's thicker than the sweaters she used to wear. She's not going to have the time to really get back into fashion, but it's possible to look more like.. like she's willing to be looked at, at least by those who see the Mask. Today she pulls the coat tighter against the cold.
<Crion> Finding it isn't difficult.
<Crion> The Huntsman is standing in front of a storefront window on the corner as you turn onto a wider, main drag, completely empty. The storefront is fake, of course; there's no store behind it. The lovingly-stencilled old-timey shop logo is gibberish. But since the storefront is fake, the window has a reflective sheen.
<Crion> So it stands there, staring at itself.
<dammitwho> Hoorm?
<trenchfoot> Um.
<Crion> It doesn't seem to have noticed you. Yet.
<CBN> Tony pauses and looks at the others. Probably not best to open with gunfire if we're trying to win this thing over, so he won't open with gunfire.
<VoxPVoxD> After a few seconds of intensely uncomfortable waiting, Stewart squeezes Lauren and then... whistles for the Huntsman's attention.
<dammitwho> Probably too late to hide behind a mailbox. Hopefully Stewart's got a good line for this guy.
<trenchfoot> Nels' hand hasn't left her side where her revolver is, but she won't fire if it won't.
<Crion> The Huntsman starts, straightens, and then slowly...slowwwwly...its head turns to consider the motley.
<Crion> Lauren steps forward. "Hi...?"
<banana> How is a bodyguard meant to look? Does a dryad in Gendo Ikari glasses look like one? It'll have to do.
<Crion> The Huntsman has burning red LED eyes, like Lauren's in her Mien but more piercing. It -- he -- cooly takes heavy blackout shades from a jacket pocket and covers them up. There's a huge handgun in his right hand, but he hasn't raised it yet.
<Crion> Lauren: "I don't...think we've met. Not really. Last time there were...werewolves. I..." She steps back and gestures around. "I brought people with me. My people. Because of what you're here. What you've been...made to come here to do? But I don't want to fight."
<Crion> "And I'm not going back."
<Crion> The Huntsmen: "Your people." The voice is metallic, and yes, there's a heavy Austrian accent beneath it. Not quite Arnold though, just like he's not really Arnold in the face.
<trenchfoot> Nels waves with the hand that isn't by her gun.
<Crion> "Your people...are not targets."
<banana> Melanie: "You'd have to go through us, though."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "That's not really why we're here, though. Not to fight."
<CBN> Tony clarifies: "Specifically to NOT fight. To help."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "We know where your heart is."
<Crion> The Huntsman: "If you are not targets. What are you."
<Crion> At Stewart's revelation, the Huntsman makes a growling exhalation that sounds almost like a metal plate being twisted.
<Crion> His fingers roll around the grip of the handgun, but still he doesn't raise it.
<Crion> To Stewart: "I could kill you. Easily. You know this. You protect her anyway."
<Crion> "Why."
<VoxPVoxD> Without thinking: "Because I love her."
<Crion> The Huntsman, in pure Arnold voice: "Hrrh. Nice."
<Crion> "That is...nice."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "We want to help you."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "We can restore to you what you've lost." She doesn't miss a beat about the declaration of love.
<VoxPVoxD> "We came here to help you."
<VoxPVoxD> "And we need your help, too."
<Crion> He tilts his head.
<VoxPVoxD> "Your heart isn't where it should be, you know that. And where it is... it's making a little girl's dreams worse. Foreign dreams. Machine dreams of metal and power and a sky where all the stars are dim."
<VoxPVoxD> "If we work together, you can save yourself, and you can save Sarah Connor."
<Crion> He inhales deeply at that name. Perhaps, in retrospect, it was a mistake for Sky Mother to fashion a Huntsman out of a character who is a hero in all but one of those movies.
<Crion> Finally: "Then I will go with you."
<Crion> "I want to live."
<VoxPVoxD> "Then you're one of us."
<VoxPVoxD> "We have a friend who can show us the way. Let's go."
<Crion> A bit more smoothly than before, he holsters that giant handgun, and nods.
<Crion> Lauren exhales and deflates a little bit, leaning against Stewart briefly before straightening up. To the big man: "Do you have a name?"
<trenchfoot> Nels: "You have a preferred name?" Conversationally, like she wasn't just expecting that to break out into a gunfight.
<trenchfoot> Good to see they're on the same page.
<Crion> The Huntsman: "I am a model--"
<Crion> He frowns. "My predecessor was Something Awful. I am Something Worse."
<banana> It works. It really works, they're trapped by stories.. Melanie tamps down the shock and follows.
<VoxPVoxD> That this worked doesn't shock Stewart at all. To him, we're all trapped by stories.
<CBN> Tony: "Alright then. Good? To have you with us, SW. Let's go." Tony heads out.
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Well, Something Worse. Yeah. Good to have you with us."
<Crion> Something Worse nods. He'll be constantly actively scanning the Hedge as they walk, but otherwise will not speak unless spoken to.
<Crion> Lead on.
<Crion> Soon you come upon the Gate of Horn belonging to John of the Falls, more or less where you left it, but without any of the onerous proving challenges that were here last time. And in fairness, even if they had been, you do have someone with you who could kind of just walk through them.
<CBN> Tony: "And that's how we get here. Nice. Anything we should brief SW on before we continue?"
<Crion> The Huntsman arches an eyebrow over his heavy shades.
<trenchfoot> Nels is just glad she doesn't have to sing to the weird snake again. I mean, it seemed to enjoy the experience, but that was concerning. "I think we're good? No enemies here, just... the future."
<banana> Melanie: "Through the Gate is our ally, John. He has an in to Sarah Connor's head."
<Crion> If you're ready, all that's left is to knock.
<CBN> Tony: "Also, spooky house, John's cool. Should be good to go, right everyone?"
<CBN> Tony knocks.
<trenchfoot> Nels is going to have to figure out why they keep calling Rebecca Connor "Sarah." Middle name, sure, but...
<Crion> Boom boom boom. The knocker ripples...then recedes into the door.
<Crion> But it doesn't open.
<banana> Not this again!
<Crion> Instead a face presses through the great basalt slabs like it's a thin film of skin, skeletal and grinning, eye sockets empty.
<VoxPVoxD> "Hey."
<Crion> It swings left and right, seeming somehow to take you all in, and then:
<Crion> "So you've done it," booms the voice of John of the Falls, from somewhere and nowhere at once.
<dammitwho> "Hi there."
<CBN> Tony: "This part anyway."
<trenchfoot> Nels just arches an eyebrow.
<Crion> "Greetings, Huntsman. Greetings, motley. When this door opens, it will be Rebecca Sarah Connor's Gate of Horn. I expect you to remember you are in the mind of a child, and conduct yourselves accordingly. You have the power to save her...or hurt her quite badly. And remember: nothing in there is real. Everything in there is a metaphor. You are solving a puzzle, not winning a war."
<trenchfoot> Hand away from the gun. Got it.
<Crion> "Are you prepared?"
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart feels so much more comfortable doing this than waiting and thinking about doing this. "We're ready."
<CBN> Tony: "Yes."
<banana> Melanie: "A title of the sky mother invaded this girl's head and left the heart of something worse behind. We have to help her and we have to be gentle about it. That's the precis."
<Crion> The skeletal head nods. "Good luck."
<Crion> A great, searing light runs down the seam in the basalt door, the head, bisected, recedes, and the doors throw themselves open to a blinding white light.
<CBN> Tony nods to Stewart. "Lead on, chief."
<Crion> It's Lauren who goes first.
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart's close behind.
<Crion> So how many of y'all have seen Terminator (1984) and Terminator 2: Judgment Day (1991)?
<trenchfoot> What are those?
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart has.
<Crion> Those who have recognize this as the future setting of those movies, where Skynet has won and humanity is being hunted down and exterminated. The rest of you just see a nightmarish fever dream of improbable smoke, odd war machines, burned out, ruined buildings, and skeletal silver monster-robots grinning as they hunt down and murder screaming, fleeing civilians.
<banana> Melanie's seen both but she doesn't remember them well, as it was Before. She wouldn't remember at all except that they're really good movies and she's refreshed her memory with wiki synopses.
<Crion> The people don't seem to see you, and there's something...insubstantial about them? They seem like they're recorded on film. When they push past you, you feel no pressure on your arm or chest.
<banana> Muttering: "If the girl dreams this world, she's going to be very confused someday."
<trenchfoot> "This is - she's a kid?" Utter cruelty.
<Crion> The skeletons though...the skeletons CAN see you. They raise their weapons...
<Crion> And Something Worse, ignoring everything that John of the Falls just said, leaps forward -- a literal 20-foot leap -- and begins removing heads from bodies.
<dammitwho> Well, we'll just have to-- whoa! Look at that!
<trenchfoot> Suddenly really glad he's on our side. Or at least not against our side.
<Crion> Robot skeleton heads, of course.
<CBN> Tony just watches. This is probably ok for now.
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart calls to SW: "We need to keep moving forward."
<Crion> Punching a skeleton's head off without looking: "Understood."
<banana> Melanie freezes, unsure - is this okay? Does hurting dream-creatures hurt the dreamer?
<trenchfoot> It would be difficult to stop him, and they do seem angry at us.
<Crion> Lauren, to Stewart: "Okay. Okay. What are we doing? Are we looking for Linda Hamilton?"
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "We're actors in a story. We have to help this play out to keep going."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart looks around for a cop car they can steal.
<Crion> Lauren: "Okay so...is this 1 or 2?"
<Crion> Well, you're in the hideous far future. All the cop cars are burnt out. You need to get sent to the past for that..
<trenchfoot> Nels: "One or two whats?" Maybe not the time.
<CBN> Tony: "I gotta hope it's two, for the sake of us and SW getting along. That's the one where he's good right?"
<banana> Melanie: "We need to find something hidden, right. Is there a.. safe or bunker, some totemic place in the story that you need to get to?"
<Crion> Something Worse is currently covering your advanced with twin longslide 1911s.
<banana> "..nice moves.."
<Crion> *advance
<dammitwho> Maggie: "Do the robit skeletons have a controller of some kind? I never saw the movies."
<Crion> Lauren: "I don't see Sky Mother. And they only meet Skynet in the movies in Salvation and Genisys..."
<trenchfoot> Nice guns. And nice firearms, too.
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "A Cyberdyne building maybe?"
<Crion> "We're looking for Sarah Conner, right? This is her dream, she's gotta be here somewhere, even if it's not the right part of the timeline...?"
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Her home? It'd be kinda straightforward, but she is pretty young..."
<banana> "That seems like a good start, find the dreamer. Things will be happening around her."
<Crion> Lauren: "Wait! Shit! No! JOHN Connor, right?? Like, this is the future! We're looking for John Connor!"
<Crion> Something Worse's eyes flare. "I recognize that name."
<VoxPVoxD> "So he can send us back to protect her. Right, yeah, that makes sense."
<banana> Melanie: "Either way.. John, the other John, he said we can shape this place the same as the hedge. We can warp it to locate someone, though we mustn't break.. important dream bits."
<banana> "By dream-logic, in this scene of massacre.. should we head to where they're all running from?"
<CBN> Tony: "Or where they're running TO, if that's where the Human Resistance is, in this?"
<Crion> It's worth noting some of the human survivor props are firing back -- they're just getting slaughtered over and over again on repeat. But you might be able to divine what they're defending from where they are. To the extent spatial position matters in a dream world.
<trenchfoot> Hmm. Same as the hedge. A song Nels doesn't immediately recognize comes to mind, and she begins whistling, ignoring any of the dreamer's nightmares taking notice. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mpMg1upld0w Then, to punctuate - she begins knocking on the nearest wall. Ba-dum bum ba bum. Ba-dum bum ba - holy shit, is that a door?
<Crion> Something Worse perks up as she whistles. His eyes glow through his shades.
<Crion> The door pops open. A trooper yells, "Are you with the resistance?!"
<VoxPVoxD> Holy shit what.
<VoxPVoxD> Did she just-
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart's agog.
<banana> ....... ".........Yes."
<Crion> The Huntsman is laying down covering fire like you've rarely seen, even in a movie. Just one-shotting everyone.
<Crion> The trooper waves them all forward. "This way, ma'am! He's waiting for you!"
<Crion> Something Worse finishes clearing the field, then when the door closes behind them, he jams the lock.
<Crion> They're now in a hazy, sewer-like bunker. The trooper is leading them forward through halls filled with huddling civilians.
<trenchfoot> It is the practice of one hundred years in Arcadia that stops Nels from immediately fainting. Oh my god, she just did that.
<CBN> Tony is grinning ear to ear. Never thought this would be anywhere near this enjoyable or entertaining.
<Crion> "He'll be so glad to see you all ma'am -- we didn't think you'd made it -- left here --"
<Crion> You arrive at a big metal door, and the trooper bangs three times.
<banana> Who do they think we are?! What did Nels do? The whole Wyrd pivoted.
<Crion> Door opens. Another trooper, basically the same as the first: "My god! They're here! TELL GENERAL CONNOR AND COMMANDER REESE THEY'RE HERE!"
<Crion> So, again, if you've seen a Terminator movie, you probably know who the two guys standing in the center of the room are. Weirdly, it's the Terminator Salvation John Connor -- Christian Bale.
<Crion> Flat American accent and all.
<VoxPVoxD> It's Batman!
<trenchfoot> She might know the secret passage to their secret base, but none of these people look familiar. The song is still pounding through her head.
<Crion> "Thank God," says John Connor. "We thought you were lost. And you brought the hero machine?"
<Crion> He's looking at Something Worse.
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart nods.
<Crion> Kyle Reese's eyes narrow. "Are you sure you're up for this mission, soldier?" he asks the Huntsman.
<dammitwho> Hey, it's some guy!
<Crion> In his hands, he holds a shining, pulsing red orb.
<Crion> "This will take you to the past. Put you on mission. Are you ready for that?"
<Crion> Something Worse steps forward, guns holstered...and for the first time, seeing his heart like that, he hesitates. "...I am willing."
<Crion> Dream-Reese: "Not the question, soldier. You're going back to a world you know nothing about, to find someone you were supposed to kill, and protect her. I asked you: are you ready for that?"
<Crion> The hesitation is gone. "I am ready."
<banana> Melanie drops back to murmur to Lauren: "Is this an okay metaphor? Think about the implications."
<Crion> Reese holds up the orb. The bunker rattles around you as the Terminators penetrate the outer walls. A klaxon blares: two minutes until full annihilation.
<Crion> Lauren, to Melanie: "Yes."
<Crion> The hero machine takes the orb, and the whole world goes white.
<Crion> Somewhere in Baltimore County, a little girl stops shivering in her sleep.
<Crion> Somewhere in the Hedge, you appear outside a great basalt door.
<dammitwho> Maggie looks around, stunned. Then she puts her arm around Nels' shoulders and guffaws. "HAW!"
<CBN> Tony: "Nels! The absolute coolest beans!"
<trenchfoot> Nels: "Oh my goodness."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart sweeps Nels up in a giant hug as soon as they're out.
<Crion> There's a strange stretching sound as John of the Falls pokes his face out of the door again. "Exceptionally well done. You honor the freehold. The child is safe now, if you were wondering."
<CBN> Tony: "We were, and that's even better!"
<Crion> Lauren meanwhile puts her hand on Something Worse's shoulder...and he takes off the shades, tossing them aside. Then the jacket. Then the grenades beneath the jacket. Then carbine somehow stored on his back beneath the jacket.
<Crion> Soon he's there in a black tee, bootcut jeans, and only two pistols. "Better," he says.
<banana> Melanie: "You're the big damn hero now." She's either speaking to Something or to Nels.
<Crion> Lauren and Something Worse speak quietly for a moment, and then he turns to the rest of you. "I want to thank you all. For freeing me. Now I must leave."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "You keeping the name?" She might collapse soon.
<Crion> "I..." He looks at Lauren, who nods encouragingly. "'Need time.'"
<dammitwho> "Sure thing. Hope you like independent life, big fella!"
<Crion> To Nels: "Yes. I am informed there is always something worse. Therefore, it is suitable."
<VoxPVoxD> After a moment Stewart moves to stand beside Lauren. "Thank you so much," he says to the former huntsman.
<Crion> "You are welcome, Stewart."
<Crion> "Thank you all again."
<CBN> Tony: "Take care of yourself out there."
<trenchfoot> "See you when we see you." She's going to be leaning on Stewart's shoulder, if he's still close. "See you later, Something Worse."
<Crion> He turns to leave, but pauses after three steps. To Lauren: "Find me if I am needed."
<Crion> Then he turns, and goes.
<Crion> A few moments after he's gone, Lauren half-swoons against Stewart. "Holy shit."
<Crion> "Holy shit, Nels!!"
<Crion> Since Nels is basically right there, Lauren will bear hug her too.
<trenchfoot> Faintly: "I don't even know why that worked. It just - felt right."
<banana> Melanie applauds, since nobody did during the actual performance.
<trenchfoot> She accepts the hug with grace, and will return it.
<CBN> Tony looks at Lauren and Stewart, then glances at the rest of the group. "There's gotta be a 24-hour diner or something open for us. Stewart, if you two just wanna...leave a sock on the Wherehouse door until whenever, I think we would all understand."
<Crion> Lauren: "Oh for fuck's sake, let's all get something to eat."
<CBN> Tony laughs. "Works for me."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart, very quickly: "Yeah I'm hungry, are you guys hungry? Let's get some food."
<dammitwho> Maggie: "I could eat."
<trenchfoot> Nels: "I need to go lay down. Oh my God. That -- happened."
<banana> "You might wanna talk to John about it later. Maybe you've got a talent for dreams."
<CBN> Tony: "Gary Wright's got a song about that even! You guys know---of course you don't."
<banana> Absolutely no idea.
<banana> Let's find a diner with the long seats so Nels can collapse on one as we eat over her victorious corpse.
<trenchfoot> Anything with eggs.
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart will stop at home to drop off his gun and also to make a full report through Ravens on the total victory achieved.
<Crion> He gets congratulations back through the Ravens in their inimicable style, and a similarly congratulatory text from Gerald some 30 minutes later (he was over at his brother's place).
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart's almost delirious with relief. The feeling lingers for at least a couple of days. How's Lauren doing over that time?
<Crion> Spending more and more time back at her place...but not yet truly moving out.
<Crion> Chup seems to like it there.
<Crion> I mean, he doesn't like Stewart, of course. But he does like florping all over Stewart's furniture and possessions and so on, while making faces.
<VoxPVoxD> One day while Stewart is putting groceries away, he says with no preamble: "So I've been thinking."
<Crion> Lauren, at her computer, turns in the chair. "Yeah?"
<VoxPVoxD> "Are you on a lease?"
<Crion> Her eyes literally flare. Bad Mien for concealing emotion. "It's up in a month or two," she says casually.
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "Cause like... I know the circumstances are very weird, and I don't know if this is... I don't want to pressure you or, or move faster than you're comfortable with."
<Crion> Lauren: "You're not doing that."
<VoxPVoxD> "Okay. Okay. Do you want to stay?"
<VoxPVoxD> "Cause I... want you to stay."
<Crion> "Yes!!"
<Crion> "Chup, do you want to stay?"
<Crion> Chup: "mao."
<Crion> "I think that's a yes."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "Great! Cool. Cool cool cool. I think we're gonna want to mess with the furniture some more, make your setup feel like a more organic part of the apartment. And you gotta help decorate, obviously. There's a closet here that's just full of stuff from sponsors, we've got plenty of storage..." Breezing past the emotional weight of the decision and plunging directly into tasks
<VoxPVoxD> that can be done feels a lot more manageable than the red-hot giddiness in his chest.
<Crion> A bit hesitantly: "So do you want me to keep my computer here, or should I move it...?"
<Crion> "Just, you know, for a permanent home. For the computer."
<Crion> "And yeah, we're -- we can change a bunch of stuff."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "I was thinking maybe we could figure out a way to split the office."
<Crion> "About this whole...thing."
<VoxPVoxD> "You know I don't want you to have to be on camera constantly, but."
<Crion> "Hmmmm. I'd like that...but I worry about the heat output. We need to figure out good venting..."
<Crion> She waves a hand. "I don't care about that. The camera stuff. I'm fine with that."
<Crion> "It's just going to get really fucking hot in there in July."
<VoxPVoxD> "The heat we can fix, but the noise from the heat solutions might be an issue..."
<Crion> "I mean...it's a temporary problem, right? With both our incomes, once your lease is up..."
<Crion> Her eyes flush. "Sorry. That's getting ahead of things."
<VoxPVoxD> Stewart: "Which is July, by the way."
<VoxPVoxD> "Not that I'm counting."
<Crion> She smiles at that.
<Crion> Chup, as always, is unimpressed.
<banana> From: paperbark@summer.ctl
<banana> To: listl@losf.org
<banana> Subject: Thank you
<banana>
<banana> Hi, Mr. List. I wanted to catch you up on how things are going with the 'Wherehouse' motley.
<banana>
<banana> I believe the seasonal leaders made a great decision, even regardless of whatever danger's been foreseen. Now that I've got my feet and met more Baltimore changelings, I've seen that most of us are loners, cooperating through the court structure and specialisation but eschewing human-style reflexive trust.
<banana>
<banana> Taking the leap of faith to rely on others of your kind isn't just a relief. 'Managing' the local Hedge operations gives us a kind of task-expertise where synergies are readily obvious. Is there an analogy with the way most members of the courts have a particular role, a task to benefit the Lost that in the tasking renders them found? I'd like to do more for Summer if you've any needs.
<banana>
<banana> We saved Lauren's Huntsman from their Keeper today. Nels captured the whole Heart-dream in a song and simply wove us straight to the end, or to the beginning.
<banana>
<banana> Melanie Lucas